08:30:01 I'm hiding from the light. The light is just shining in bright on me this morning.
08:30:05 All right. I want to talk to you about nighttime eating.
08:30:08 I've had some nighttime eating come back up for me.
08:30:13 and it's
08:30:14 given me the opportunity
08:30:17 to rely
08:30:19 Just take another look at it, right?
08:30:22 I was talking to my accountability partner about it
08:30:26 And sharing with her how some of my nighttime eating has come back up.
08:30:31 And what's going on with that. And I think it's just
08:30:34 the change of season and some of that old habit stuff comes back in
08:30:39 And so as I was paying attention to it.
08:30:43 I was remembering what it used to be like
08:30:46 Back in the day when I first started losing weight.
08:30:49 And so I thought, this is so
08:30:52 normal. This is so like what almost all of the people that I help
08:30:57 go through. So it's a great opportunity to get to share it with you.
08:31:02 So what used to happen
08:31:06 And oh gosh, please write in and tell me if this is you because
08:31:11 100%, right? This is what so many of us go through and it feels great to know that we are normal and that we are not alone.
08:31:21 And so the nighttime eating, what used to happen
08:31:24 was I would go all day long, go, go, go, go, go. I would get up and I would like take care of everything for the family. I would go to work, take care of everything at work.
08:31:34 I would come home, take care of all the dinner or back when our son was younger, I would run around getting him to wherever he needed to be.
08:31:43 And I wore myself out, wore myself ragged.
08:31:47 And in the evenings.
08:31:49 When I finally got it all done, that was my time.
08:31:52 That was the time for me. And so what I would do is I would binge watch tv
08:31:59 And I had this habit of nighttime eating. And so it gave me pleasure.
08:32:05 it gave me something just for me.
08:32:09 And I…
08:32:11 Remember, when I first started trying to lose weight.
08:32:14 how I was so focused on not overeating. I was so focused on making a plan and doing what I say I'll do and not overeating.
08:32:24 making sure I only ate when I was physically hungry. And so that's how I help people. I make sure that you get to have the foods you love, but we learn how to have them when we're hungry.
08:32:35 We eat to just enough so that we're not overeating. We're not eating when we're not hungry.
08:32:41 And that's how we get to still have the foods. So we're learning how
08:32:45 to have foods we love in a way
08:32:48 that supports our body. It supports our health, it supports our weight, all those things, right? And so
08:32:54 When I started having this nighttime eating come back up again.
08:32:57 I hadn't done that for so long. I was like, what in the world is going on here? And so as I've sat and looked through this.
08:33:06 Yes, I used to do everything for all the other people, right? The people pleaser in me, the mom, let's just call it the momming in me, because as a mom, most of us have not learned how to take care of ourselves so that then there's more of us.
08:33:20 to take care of others. We just take care of everyone else, always depleting from our own self, our own gas tank, our own reserves of
08:33:30 love and care for ourselves is just not there. It's for everyone else, right? And so as I learned to lose weight.
08:33:38 The biggest thing was learning how to take care of myself.
08:33:41 And so I
08:33:43 with this nighttime eating coming back up, I started looking at like
08:33:48 What is it that's going on?
08:33:50 And I think it was just an awareness to say, hey, I think that
08:33:56 we can practice some of the thinking that we had intentionally started practicing back in the day.
08:34:02 that can be
08:34:04 reiterate it again. And so it's time to bring some of that back. But also it's my body's kind of alert of saying like.
08:34:11 maybe you're not taking as great a care of yourself as you thought.
08:34:15 And so for nighttime.
08:34:18 That's my time and so that's my time
08:34:21 That's what I always used to think. And truly anything I'm doing is something I've chose to do.
08:34:28 So as I worked through that old nighttime eating, I had to start saying things like that intentionally. I would, throughout the whole day.
08:34:37 find things that were just for me. And so baby, I'm going to sit in the car for, you know, I got somewhere early and I'm like.
08:34:44 Oh, I'm just going to sit here and like close my eyes and listen to my favorite music for 15 minutes because I'm here early.
08:34:53 Or I am going to take my shoes off on my lunch break and just put my feet in the grass out.
08:34:59 out in our break area or I'm going to go take a walk. And this is just for me.
08:35:05 Or I'm packing a lunch of my favorite things.
08:35:08 One of the things I did so that I stopped having like treat food feel like it was so
08:35:15 hard to control myself around. I broke the habit of having it at nighttime so that I wouldn't feel restricted not having it. I would eat it on my lunch break. So it was something totally different.
08:35:25 And so I remember packing, and I still do this sometimes. I did it this week. I packed chocolate covered cashews
08:35:31 As part of my lunch and I got to enjoy them in the middle of the day so that I'm not having them at nighttime.
08:35:38 And it's part of that old cycle that I'm still trying to break.
08:35:41 And it makes the food not have to be bad or good. And so I'm not feeling out of control and it's easier for me at lunchtime to have those foods.
08:35:52 When I'm not so tired, I'm not so depleted from the entire day.
08:35:57 I also don't let myself get so depleted from an entire day anymore. And so if I'm noticing I'm getting depleted, I'm going to decide, is this
08:36:05 a period of time where like there's a few things going on and it's just going to be a little bit
08:36:12 busy right now for maybe a few days or a week or something like that. Maybe it's just a period of time that this is busy. This isn't forever.
08:36:20 And that hope that
08:36:23 that understanding of the timeframe of it helps me a lot too. And so I don't need to eat then. I'm not too tired. I'm taking care of myself. I'm giving myself exactly what I want, whether it's activities through the day, the foods that I really love.
08:36:37 any of that. So the other thing that I have really started realizing here recently
08:36:44 was that
08:36:47 At nighttime i
08:36:51 think that that's my only time. I said that, right? This is my only time for me. And so I'm going to do the things that entertain me or excite me. And so nighttime eating used to
08:37:03 excite me. It used to entertain me.
08:37:05 It is not an entertainment that goes well with weight loss. And so if we were competitive eaters, maybe nighttime eating would fit very much in alignment with that. But I'm not a competitive eater.
08:37:18 I want to be healthy. I want to have weight loss. And so it's just not the entertainment that I want frequently. And so especially if I'm not physically hungry for it.
08:37:28 And yes, you can make yourself have enough room left over after dinner if that's what you want, if you want to enjoy some nighttime eating or if you want to enjoy like an after dinner snack or dessert with your family. You can make sure that you leave enough hunger
08:37:44 So that you'll be able to enjoy that food being hungry.
08:37:49 But that's not what I was doing. I was usually alone. I was usually at nighttime. I was usually in my TV watching chair. I was usually under my cozy blanket.
08:38:00 And I was snacking on candies or I was snacking on ice cream and so
08:38:05 What has happened was I realized that a lot of those old habits had started to come back.
08:38:11 And so I was like, what's going on? And I'm like, I'm just a little bit tired.
08:38:16 And so how can i can
08:38:19 redefine what my nighttime is.
08:38:22 And so my nighttime now
08:38:27 I'm realizing is my rest time.
08:38:30 Sometimes it's my entertainment time.
08:38:34 Sometimes my nighttime is my connection time with my husband.
08:38:38 talking to him or getting to enjoy our day or just spend time together.
08:38:43 Sometimes my nighttime is where I really like to read or I like to have quiet, or sometimes I really like to watch TV
08:38:51 And totally zone out.
08:38:53 Instagram reels, whatever it is. And so I started redefining
08:38:58 what nighttime was for me because nighttime used to be this big story, this big dramatic story that I used to tell myself
08:39:07 that it is the only time I get to do anything for me.
08:39:11 And that's not true anymore. I do a lot of things for me. I do things all throughout the day, as I said.
08:39:18 I am an empty nester i just
08:39:20 it's a period of time in my life where I have more time to even like I have the entire evening every single day
08:39:27 And so I am not running kids anywhere anymore. And so I have so much more time. And so even when I was running kids, I made sure I had time. So that was still a story that I didn't have to tell myself anymore.
08:39:39 So as I redefined this nighttime for myself.
08:39:44 I realized that like
08:39:47 I was saying things like, this is the only time.
08:39:50 And it's not true. So I caught on to myself. I caught on to that story. And so I love this phrase. My coach had told me
08:40:00 I don't remember if it was mel
08:40:03 Mel Robbins or Brene Brown. I hate that I can't give credit to the right person, but she said, the story I tell myself, the story in my head, I think it was Mel Robbins.
08:40:13 The story in my head is. And so it's really great when you're trying to talk to your husband about something and you're like.
08:40:20 like this isn't real. Like, I just think that you don't like me or I just think that you're mad at me or I think I'm not enough. And so like the story in my head is it's a great way to like figure out what's going on, what you're thinking.
08:40:33 that without it having to be fact or true, right? So the story in my head was it was the only time for myself.
08:40:42 And it was that everything throughout the day was so stressful and that I
08:40:48 only had time in the evenings for entertainment.
08:40:51 And so it was so funny because as soon as I caught on to myself thinking that I could start changing the narrative.
08:40:59 I could change that story in my head. And so the story is that the evening is for lots of things, rest, relaxation. Sometimes it is for connection. Sometimes it is for entertainment.
08:41:11 It's for a lot of things.
08:41:13 And food is one way that I have used in the past to rest or to
08:41:20 get entertainment from.
08:41:22 it's not the way that I choose to very often or hardly ever.
08:41:28 And so as I started saying that, I was like, oh, what else gives me rest? Oh, what else gives me connection? What else gives me entertainment?
08:41:36 And the other one that I really loved that had caught on to myself thinking
08:41:41 is that I had to have entertainment. I had to have
08:41:46 some type of food or I had to have something that didn't just let me rest.
08:41:51 And so I was fighting
08:41:53 the rest. And so as I thought like, oh, well, food gives me entertainment when I'm bored because I kept saying, oh, it's bored eating. It's bored eating.
08:42:09 And so if I'm bored eating, what's wrong with being bored? And why do I think I'm bored? Why am I?
08:42:09 choosing to use the word bored and so
08:42:12 If I am looking at this, I'm like, why am I choosing to use the word board? It could just be, I'm just having a real chill evening.
08:42:20 And so I thought, oh, I love that i'm just
08:42:23 I'm just chilling out. And so it's just relaxing. And so as I bring that energy down.
08:42:31 to it's just a chilly evening. It's just relaxing. I don't need to have that pump me up kind of energy. I don't need to be entertained.
08:42:40 I loved that. So I have really paid attention to what was going on when I was having those nighttime cravings. Sometimes I'm a little frustrated with my day.
08:42:51 That doesn't mean I need food. It didn't take away the frustration.
08:42:54 Sometimes I'm like, oh, there's just a lot going on.
08:42:57 And like, I'm just now realizing I'm breathing, like I'm just calm and breathing maybe for the first time in the day.
08:43:05 absolutely can create some pauses throughout my day to breathe more, but I also
08:43:10 There's nothing wrong with like finally feeling that
08:43:14 that release of the busyness from the day. And so when I realized
08:43:20 I don't have to be entertained all the time. I don't have to eat as I'm transitioning out of something else.
08:43:27 Those were old habits that I did. And a lot of times just knowing like.
08:43:32 I'm just frazzled or I'm just upset or I'm just worried or I'm a little bit bored thinking that I need to be entertained or I'm not used to having quiet and rest.
08:43:43 That's my big one. I'm not used to having quiet and rest.
08:43:48 this is just what it feels like.
08:43:50 I got used to feeling those emotions and how that felt to have that go on in that moment. So I wasn't trying to get out of it.
08:43:58 So yeah, in the beginning, I absolutely ate because it was a distraction. It was how I took care of things.
08:44:04 Then I started realizing there's other things I can do besides food
08:44:10 to take care of that same thing. And now, full circle, now I don't feel like I need to get out of that.
08:44:16 Now I'm very aware of what I am feeling and it's normal.
08:44:20 I don't need to rush through it. I don't need to rush to get out of it or to change the emotion or the situation.
08:44:27 I'm like, oh, this is what rest feels like.
08:44:31 This is what calm feels like.
08:44:33 I'm feeling energy in my body because I'm coming down to the calm.
08:44:38 And then I can a lot of times a big breath will do exactly what the food used to do.
08:44:44 This is so good. Or like, oh.
08:44:46 I'm so ready to turn the TV on.
08:44:50 I'm so ready to get my book out or scroll Instagram or whatever the thing is.
08:44:55 that I've chose to do with my evening. And it doesn't have to be food. So food was mindless for me.
08:45:01 And now I'm taking back my mind. I'm being more aware. I'm being very intentional with what's going on. And it feels very good.
08:45:10 So when I have food, I really enjoy it. And sometimes our family, we like to have ice cream in the evening together.
08:45:18 We will absolutely do that too. And I'm not missing out on that either. I'm not saying I'm never going to nighttime eat.
08:45:25 I'm just going to do it with my eyes wide open. I'm going to know why I'm doing it and it's not going to be against myself.
08:45:32 Because I'm not afraid anymore to just sit with whatever is going on.
08:45:37 I'm not afraid to find other things for myself if that's what I want to do too so
08:45:44 It's been a great opportunity to get to share this with you. What was my nighttime eating and why was it coming back all of a sudden? And so
08:45:53 That is a fun thing for me even to get to see how my journey has
08:45:59 ebbed and flowed and how far I've come and what kind of realizations I've had with myself. It's so empowering when you start to realize
08:46:09 how much control you have over your eating, how much control you have over your emotions.
08:46:15 it doesn't even feel like it needs to be in control anymore. It just feels like it needed some understanding. I needed some compassion for myself and some understanding that awareness does so much.
08:46:28 Instead of trying to fight it.
08:46:30 And so instead of trying to think that I'm bad because I'm eating at nighttime and I'm overeating.
08:46:36 I just got more compassionate with myself. I got more loving with myself. I just wanted to figure out what was going on.
08:46:43 And that was so much more important than trying to strong arm myself, white knuckle or willpower my way through not having that nighttime eating.
08:46:51 I hope this was helpful for you. I know that all my clients love when they get to hear that I'm not perfect. I am so far from perfect.
08:47:00 I still have overeates. I still have times where I don't want to make a plan or I don't do something just perfect. And it's because I'm human and I'm normal.
08:47:10 I just talk to myself differently now.
08:47:12 As I said, I hope this was helpful. Please write in and tell me what you got out of it, if I can help you with anything, I would love that too.
08:47:21 So if you want to talk, schedule like a quick little consult. We'll talk and we can figure out what's going on for you. Coachingkara.com forward slash free call.
08:47:32 If you want to jump on my next webinar, I'm currently doing a webinar series, Everything Your Doctor Wants You To Know, Losing Weight.
08:47:39 And you can join the next one that's scheduled. And that would be coachingara.com forward slash sign up.
08:47:47 Hope to see you soon. Bye.
