09:24:25 Yo-yo dieting is a word that I've heard forever. Yo-yo. It means up and down, up and down. We're on the diet, we're off the diet.
09:24:33 And there are a lot of dangers with that yo-yo dieting.
09:24:38 Right now I'm hearing the word danger and I'm thinking of my great nephew and he calls everything Halloween spooky. And so nothing scary, he says, but everything's spooky. And so the spookiness.
09:24:51 of the yo-yo dieting
09:24:54 is that every single time you're
09:24:57 Hope is getting shattered.
09:24:59 Your self-confidence is getting shattered.
09:25:02 every single part of the yo-yo effect is not healthy. And so when we look at that as
09:25:10 This is damaging to my self-esteem. This is damaging to my confidence and my ability
09:25:17 You can see why each time it makes it harder and harder to try again.
09:25:23 Each time it makes it so much harder to have belief in ourself, belief that we can do things.
09:25:29 It makes it feel bigger and bigger and spookier and spookier. And I'm going to disagree with little Vincent and say it's downright scary because
09:25:38 When we don't believe in ourselves.
09:25:41 We absolutely
09:25:43 are shattered. We shatter any hope, any belief that we can do things, we shatter the idea that it can be any different. And we start to settle.
09:25:53 And as we settle, it's not in a good way. We settle in a way that feels like we're never going to be able to do anything better. And so it's very limiting. It's so disbelieving that
09:26:08 It's tragic. That's what it is. It's tragic. That wasn't the word I was looking for, but it fits really well right now.
09:26:15 Have you ever had somebody who was in such disbelief about themselves? They didn't see themselves the way you saw them and it broke your heart?
09:26:24 to think that they did not see that in themselves.
09:26:28 That's what yo-yo dieting does to us. It has us so that we don't see the good parts of us. We don't see the parts of us that we're able to be like, this is the good thing. We can do things. And so that silly word, yo-yo, yo-yo dieting is what I'm talking about. And it just, it shatters everything. It makes us feel less than. It makes us not feel important enough or capable enough.
09:26:53 And that is heartbreaking.
09:26:57 When we're looking at that, that's kind of the thing we've done with every other diet attempt before.
09:27:04 We look at how we get all on board. We're full of hope that this is the thing. We're not looking at ourselves for belief. We're looking at the diet as the next thing that can help us.
09:27:15 And we have belief in the diet or the possibility of the hope of that diet helping us or fixing us is really what we're thinking, right? Making us better and more acceptable and
09:27:25 All those things.
09:27:27 Well, then what we do is we put all of that in there and we take all of our belief in ourself away. We just give it right away. That's part of that shattering effect.
09:27:36 Each time we do that, we fall a little bit lower. We feel like we're a little less capable, a little less important, or there's just no possibilities for us in the future. And so that is not sustainable.
09:27:51 If we keep dropping our opinion of ourself down every single time we make an attempt.
09:27:57 there's going to be so little opinion of us that we're not going to be able to try. We're not going to be able to even
09:28:05 think that we're worthy of anything different.
09:28:08 it's not a worth thing. Ladies, let me tell you, it's just some habits. These are some habits.
09:28:16 We have developed these habits. So in my group, I was talking yesterday
09:28:21 about how overweight happens. It happens with overeating. That sounds so ridiculously simple. It's just overeating. And so, but we're overeating for a couple reasons. Sometimes we're overeating because of what we're having and how much of it we're having and that body chemistry is changing our hormones. And so we are over hungry all the time.
09:28:44 The other reason is over desire. And over desire, it comes specifically from our emotions, our feelings. And so when you've heard of emotional eating, emotional overeating, it's us trying to create or avoid a feeling that feels uncomfortable or that we don't know how to manage without
09:29:06 another tool. And the tool, you hear me say this, the tool that we've chosen in the past
09:29:13 was food. And that wasn't even a you problem. Your mama set you up with that. As soon as you were a baby and you came out of the womb, as soon as you cried.
09:29:22 You got a bottle or boob every single time that fixed the problem, right? Occasionally there's a diaper or some other issue, but we learn that food fixes problems from birth.
09:29:34 As adults, we think that's an us problem. That was just what we were trained to do. That was the tool that fixed it first and fastest.
09:29:42 And so that's just something that we're trying to relearn.
09:29:46 As we try to relearn that, we try to figure out how to give our body exactly what it needs. Maybe you've heard me talk about root cause methods.
09:29:53 And so we're fixing what the emotional thing is. So what is it that your emotion is trying to tell you? Like, is it that you're afraid of something or you're lonely or you're bored or you're tired? Like what is it we could actually give you to fix the problem? If we're talking about the over hunger where we're eating too much or we're eating things that are really messing with our hormones, well, we can tweak some of that too.
09:30:16 And none of this is restrictive. So I've had people who come with me
09:30:22 on this weight loss journey of coaching with me. And they've had some pretty big life events happen and they were so afraid they were going to let me down. I'm like, oh, love, please let me tell you if that's the tool that works for you today, we will deal with figuring it out later. Just get yourself healthy. Make sure yourself is safe. Your body is safe. Your mind is safe, that you're caring for yourself.
09:30:44 And if today the only tool you know how to use is food.
09:30:48 Great. Today might not have been the emergency day that we learn a new tool, but I can teach you the new tools so that when you do have those emergencies come up, you have the right tools.
09:31:00 And a lot of things just start with habits. So those habits of taking care of ourselves. So whether it's the habits of how we eat.
09:31:08 with how we take care of our body, all those simple, very small, sustainable habits that just feel like
09:31:16 common sense. You don't have to think about how to shower. You don't have to think about how to brush your teeth anymore. Those are just habits that you've developed.
09:31:24 Water, sleep, eating when you're hungry, eating too, just enough for how much your body physically needs, not overeating.
09:31:33 Those are simple, simple habits that I can help you with.
09:31:36 The other part is how I can empower you to feel
09:31:39 how you can get through hard feelings, how you can set yourself up with the tools and the resources, that feeling of I can get through something hard. And then when it's something lacking, like maybe I'm lonely or I'm bored or I'm tired, how can we give ourselves that too? So we're giving ourselves exactly what we want and exactly what we truly need, whether it's just what they think
09:32:04 tastes good. People are always a
09:32:07 amazed when I say you absolutely get to eat what you love working with me. I cannot imagine a world without pizza and chocolate.
09:32:14 It's just how are we having that? Are we having it every day because our day was a complete
09:32:20 crapshoot and like now we're eating in response to
09:32:23 the whole day trying to make that pizza or that chocolate make the whole thing feel better. No, that's not how we're going to eat it. We're going to eat it when we're hungry. We're going to eat it because we enjoy it and we're going to enjoy it while we're eating it. And it doesn't solve all the problems.
09:32:38 That's how you're able to keep having all the foods you love.
09:32:42 Pizza never made anyone fat. Eating it because we're overeating it to feel better about ourselves, we feel better about our day to fill all those voids that pizza cannot fit.
09:32:54 ever fill, that's what made us fat.
09:32:58 Eating pizza when we were hungry because we liked it.
09:33:01 While we've listened to exactly what we wanted and exactly what our body needed.
09:33:07 that doesn't make us fat. Let me help you with that.
09:33:11 That is so different than anything that
09:33:13 I was ever taught in any diet that I was ever in before. And that's how my body skyrocketed to 230 pounds. I'm only five foot two. I know you can only see me from my shoulders up if you're watching this.
09:33:26 but i
09:33:28 230 pounds on my five foot two frame is a lot of weight. And so I just remember that dress that looked like a mu mu and that one is the one that shocked me into reality of like, what have I done? I remember going to the hairdresser and just saying like, I feel like I need to like have such an awakening. I can't keep myself awake. She's pulling the back of my hair.
09:33:50 trying to keep my head upright because I had no energy.
09:33:55 So how I was feeding myself, what I was feeding myself, I wasn't taking care of myself in any kind of way.
09:34:01 And instead, I tried to make it
09:34:05 I don't even know. It's the most unloving thing I can think of. I tried to
09:34:10 to force myself
09:34:11 to care about myself. I try to force myself
09:34:16 to take care and to love myself. And those feelings weren't there yet. They weren't developed because I had too many
09:34:23 very, very strong beliefs that I was not okay. I was not worthy. I was not good enough.
09:34:28 And as I started this, yo-yo dieting did so much of that to me.
09:34:33 There's so much else too. That belief that I need to look a certain way or that like this incessant like improvement of ourselves
09:34:42 So that we can finally be good enough
09:34:45 All of that, these societal things, things we grew up with, things people told us, things we told ourselves, all the things that we took into us.
09:34:53 All of that and the yo-yo dieting. Can you imagine trying to do this on your own?
09:34:59 I am so thankful every day for the people that came on
09:35:04 my journey with me because
09:35:06 We all learned from each other. We supported each other. We made it so that it was safe.
09:35:12 My newest favoritist
09:35:14 quote has been that change only happens at the rate of safety or trust. I've heard it said both ways.
09:35:22 No wonder I couldn't change. It didn't feel safe to me.
09:35:26 And so now I work with people so that they feel safe, so that they can make changes.
09:35:31 Not because it's going to make them a better person, but because they're human and they deserve to love themselves. They deserve to be taken care of. And you're the best person for that job.
09:35:42 That is exactly what I wanted to say today. That feels good to wrap up there.
09:35:47 Looking at my notes. Yes, that's exactly what I wanted to say. And I want to invite you because I'm having a webinar that helps people with some of this. I've helped a lot of people lately with the weight loss medications and how to do things that their doctor would want them to do. So I created a whole webinar and you don't have to be on weight loss medication. It can be for non-medicated, but anybody who's wanting to lose weight.
09:36:11 I break it down into the very simplest
09:36:14 Trusting, because that's the other thing. You Google how to lose weight and you're going to get a hundred different answers. And a lot of them are not healthy. A lot of them are not sustainable, which is the big thing. We don't want that yo-yo dieting effect.
09:36:29 And so that's what I did. I reached out to a lot of medical professionals and I said, what is it that you would exactly want your patients to know if they were losing weight?
09:36:37 And so I have everything from side effects with the medications and what to do and how to specifically lose weight. I reached out to health professionals, mental health professionals, so that they could weigh in on exactly what they wanted to say and tell you too. And so we keep it very simple, very doable, and that's why it's sustainable. Everything's backed up with research and resources.
09:37:00 And so that you can trust it. One of my favorite quotes from the process of meeting with the doctors was, this is better than Google. It's only what they need and all of it's factual. So that was my favorite quote from them.
09:37:15 Take the webinar, go to coachingkara.com forward slash sign up and get the next webinar time. I'll see you later.
