2023 - 6:6 LIVE Creating Healthy Eaters Public Podcast
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[00:00:00] Welcome to the concierge weight loss podcast, where I empower you to achieve your weight loss goals and live a healthier, happier life. I'm your host, Cara Hackleman, a dedicated weight loss coach and advocate for positive change. Join me as we dive into insightful conversations, expert tips, and inspiring stories to help you transform your relationship with food and your body.
Get ready to embark on a journey of self discovery and sustainable weight loss. And don't forget to stick around until the end for a special call to action that can kickstart your transformation. Let's get started. Okay. I promise. I'm going to do the topic that I said today. So depending, I think I'm going to split this up and put this into two different videos or podcasts.
So if you started with the first one, or if you're starting with this one, know that they go together. The transfer, my transformation from the weekend that I had to share with you. And now we're going into creating healthy [00:01:00] eaters. So, part two, the original part of what we, I was planning to talk about today.
Creating healthy eaters. And so, I just need to take a quick sip and I will be ready to roll.
Okay, feeling all the emotions right now, people. All right, so, with, uh, creating healthy eaters. Our schools are out for the summer. I don't know about yours, but our kids are out for the summer. So families and children have been on my mind for the month. And so I get a lot of times that people are asking me, how do I get my kids to eat healthy?
Or what am I supposed to do? My child just plays video games and all they do is eat. And they want to know what they're supposed to do for their child. How are they supposed to handle that? They don't want their kid to be, um, fat or overweight, especially if they were, they have a lot of [00:02:00] emotions tied to that.
And so they don't want their kids picked on. They don't want all of those things. And so they're trying to figure out what to do. And so I want to talk specifically about what you can do because Generally, those conversations when people come to me is all about what not to do. And, um, with kids. adult with anybody else, you're going to want to help them.
Right? And so with saying this, I'm going to tell you a quick story. So when I was starting to lose, before I started to lose weight, I had a very kind friend and she said she'd come on my podcast later. So I am anxious to have her on later. And, uh, She was a dietitian at, or she is, a dietitian, uh, for the hospital that I work, um, do massage with.
And so she wanted to help me. This has been, I think, 2018, [00:03:00] 2019. Wanted to help me with my weight loss. I said some very unkind words to her, maybe even gave her an unkind gesture. And all I heard with her wanting to help me with my weight loss, how unacceptable I am and how I am not okay where I am at right now.
And so instead of this loving gesture, all I heard was more proof of how one more person believed what I already thought in my head that my body was so unacceptable. But it didn't push me to want to get help and take her help. It pushed me away from her because it was It felt like a, um, it was definitely not a compliment or a hand to help me.
It felt like it was, um, a criticism. It felt like it was an insult. Those are the words I was looking for. So those are usually what I tell people is like, You are going to do it completely [00:04:00] different than what you think because approaching the person head on to help them could absolutely backfire in your face and push them further away from you, which is not what you want.
So, um, which was not even the part that I wanted to talk about today. So with your Supporting other people part. We're going to talk about that because that keeps coming up in my brain. The supporting other people part, you absolutely want to do it out of love. And I don't think a big confrontation ever is going to be the answer there.
You're going to let them lead the dance. If they come to you and say, I want to get healthy, then all your is like. Great! What can I do to help you? And let them tell you what, what they want to help with, what they want you to help them with. With that, you are letting them lead the boat. You get to be an example.
So I'm going to talk about that today. And the idea is, is that when we, um, become healthy eaters [00:05:00] ourselves, we will, um, foster that positive relationship with food. And your family, those friends, Family members, your children around you are going to see that and that's going to be what changes, uh, like the generational habits.
It's going to be the thing that breaks the cycle of overeating. Not criticizing somebody, strong arming them into making big changes. There are super subtle things that you can help with. So first off, you absolutely have control over yourself. What you're saying, how you're presenting yourself, what you are eating.
I'm telling you what, if you are sitting there with the big bag of Cheetos or Doritos, big ol ice cream, you know, eating it all up, five pieces apiece on your plate, and then you're skinny as a rail and telling me I'm, I need help with weight loss while I'm watching you eat all that, I am not gonna believe you.
And so When you're a kid and [00:06:00] you're being told that carrots and broccoli are healthy for you and that's what you should eat and then you see mom and dad, you know, eating all the Girl Scout cookies and you know, going out and having all the pub foods and coming in, you know, grease stains on your t shirt and super bloated talking about how miserable your belly is.
That, they're seeing that too. And so they hear that Carrots and broccoli are what we are supposed to have, but nobody wants to eat that. They want to eat all the stuff that mom and dad are eating. So you're being an example whether you realize it or not. So as an example, just kind of think about it. You don't have to have a dietician.
I have I have wonderful resources that I get to pull from anytime and so I can find out like what the best, uh, recommendations for balanced nutrition art. But the thing is we pretty much all know what is good and what is, um, not as great, right? I don't talk about good and bad because it does. It kind of [00:07:00] creates like, um, if you get told, no, all you want to do is do it, right?
So if I tell you don't eat the Doritos, all you're going to want to do is eat the Doritos. So eat the Doritos. Just do it in a balanced way. Do it in a nutritious way. You're not going to eat. Only Doritos and then expect to feel great full of energy for hours to come, right? So maybe the and I this is going to be a terrible example Because I do not think they're fabulous foods but you know how the Lunchable was when you were a kid and it had like the Crackers and the cheese and the meat and maybe it's a better option than maybe something else But it had one piece of candy in it And so some people ate that first some people ate it last and it was kind of like the little dessert at the end Whatever it is.
That's kind of what balance looks like not a lunchable those things are super high in sodium and I would swell and not be able to get my wedding rings on but That's the point of it, is [00:08:00] balance. So have a little something in balance. So following your mindful eating, which is exactly what I teach, is mindful eating, and following your body's natural hunger responses.
The hunger cues that your body's telling you, I'm hungry, and I'm not hungry. So we're not eating when we're bored. Or just because it sounds good. We're not eating when we're stressed or tired or because it's just become a habit that we always have something when we watch TV, we always grab something when we walk in the door before we start making dinner.
So we're eating for physical hunger, foods that we love. I mean, Doritos and Hershey kisses might be right on that plan, but like it's when we're hungry, not just out of desire or boredom or celebration or whatever it is. So for physical hunger. With drinking, to be an example, um, I'm talking about water, not alcohol here, but if you prioritize water and you always have water with [00:09:00] you, your kids will see that, your family will see that water is what's the priority.
When I was growing up, my mom bought, um, one case of RC Cola a week and we used, oh gosh, we would try to all drink it until it was gone. So it created some of that, like, urgency, that deprivation because it's going to be gone soon. So we have to get it quick before it's gone. It's not going to be there all the time.
So, um, they call that food. something. Like when kids are fully not given food, and I had food but like that specific thing we didn't have very often. And so it became a bigger deal, and I don't even Oh gosh, I can't imagine having an RC Cola now. Prioritizing water. So like Fill up water glasses for dinner.
That's an easy one. You know, someone walks in the house and says, Hey, do you need a snack? Hey, you want a glass of water? And just make that very common. Um, some people [00:10:00] do fancy waters in the fridge, and it's kind of their way of like having something special. Um, but speaking the benefit of the water, this is going to be important whether it's food or water or anything.
As an example, you're not going to, I'm going to be telling them like you're doing this because I said so you're going to be the example and then you're going to say things out loud. So what that might look like is like, Oh, I think that my lips are a little dry. I must be a little partial, a little dehydrated.
Like I need to get me a glass of water. And so. So kids, your family are going to hear, Oh, when my lips are dry, it means I don't have enough water in me. So that example is going to carry with them and they're going to know like, Oh, I need water. And then do you have a bottle of water for the road? Do you have a water here?
Do you want a water with your meal? All of that. It's just going to keep. water as what we [00:11:00] drink. And the other things, if you look at what a serving of juice is recommended, it is very small. If you And our juice glasses just kept getting bigger. But if you look at back at like maybe the 1950s or 60s, the size of a juice glass was barely larger than like a double shot glass.
If you were going to do alcohol and get a double shot, it was. Very small is what juice would be, and now we pour juice in a large glass that's really made for water. And so just kind of putting that priority back on water and talking about the benefits of it. When you talk about food, so with this, there is this wonderful website.
I'm gonna give props to them. They have Instagram, I think I saw them on Facebook too, and it's called Kids Eat in Color. And that is going to give you some really great information about, there were some beautiful graphics about what we think kids are going to eat, like quantity wise and what [00:12:00] types of food, versus what they actually eat.
So they'll be able to give you some of what that mindful eating, like how much and what kinds of things to serve them. And so, one of the things that they talked about was, actually it's got great information, I hope you do go check it out, but the um, kids eat in color is what it's called. She showed, uh, she had these like cute little bento box lunch kind of things and she said if your children are very focused on candy, then give them the candy to keep the candy normal so that you're not having that kind of thought that, that restrictive deprivation, urgent, it's going to be gone soon, I need to eat it up, um, they're not going to let me have any more.
And so, But like, the picture she showed was like one little thing instead of maybe having strawberries or blueberries in the little bento cup thing. It's like they take cupcake liners and they put them in the lunchbox and put just a couple things in each thing. There was instead of a [00:13:00] little thing of blueberries, there were like two or three M& Ms.
Two or three, like not packages, two or three. So it normalizes candy Um, and if that's what your kids are really focused on give it to them But figure out how to have it so that it keeps everything balanced So what they were talking about was like how to get kids to eat Certain vegetables. So instead of like eat your vegetables.
It's healthy. You might be like Oh, these carrots, they really help our eyes. I bet we'll be able to see in the dark better. And of course, you know, depending on the age group that you're talking to. But just so that they keep hearing the benefits of what food are. Um, anything green is gonna give us energy and anything this is going to give us this and we're going to have strength from that and our bones will be strong from this.
And so like the benefits of the nutrition of different vegetables or different foods is what we talk about. And then when we're [00:14:00] having M& Ms, we will say Oh, that'll give me a little bit of energy. That was just what I wanted. Or that tastes delicious. I just needed a little bit. And so it emphasizes how much the balance that it, it's not a bad food.
It's just how we have it. So that is the example of it. Now the part that you can do fun. Explore some different meals, some planning and some prepping, and bring the kids in on it. Bring the family in on it. When I first started losing weight, I would make a plan every day. Once my family figured out what was going on, they wanted, uh, everything that I did not put on the plan.
So finally what I said was, you can have anything you want. And I will even make it for you if you tell me before I make my plan. So every Wednesday, and our son is out of the house now, we're empty nesters, but, um, [00:15:00] when he was home, I would say, tell me what you want by Wednesday, and that's what we'll put on the grocery list, so that I ordered the groceries on Wednesday so I could pick them up on Friday, and then I would make the food they wanted.
Well, if they wanted Pizza, that's fine. We can have pizza. I am going to adjust my eating for the day so that I can have pizza with them in a way that's not going to create havoc in my body as far as like bloat and stuff. You know, being all water weight and the scale going off and, you know, creating all this mind drama about I had pizza and the weight went up and now I'm back to square one.
I'm not. I had pizza. I learned how to have it. But my family, I required that they tell me ahead of time. Otherwise, you can make it yourself. And I'm going to eat what I planned, what we had planned on the menu, and you can make something else. Our son was older when I started losing weight, so you might have different things at your house.
[00:16:00] But it was very, very beneficial that I was not the only one picking what we ate. So usually I would ask my husband for a couple meal ideas, my son for a couple meal ideas. I got to put them on the plan on which day worked best for me to make them if I was the one cooking them all, um, which I like cooking.
So in our house, it is typically me cooking. And, um, sometimes I would tell my son and husband that they were going to do it, but that was how we did it. You figure out what works for you and your family. And so even having kids have a day that they're going to be the ones doing the cooking is kind of fun.
Um, maybe you're Age appropriate. You know, so like, depending on how old they are, maybe you're in there helping and they're just kind of leading the way. You're telling 'em like, okay, well this one's gonna need to be done. What do you want me to do? But giving them the responsibility to decide if they wanna do it themself or if they want you to do that part.
So, um, part of, [00:17:00] uh, healthy eating habits is kind of being age appropriate and the dietary and portion sizes for children and. It's going to be a little different. I am not a child psychologist, but give this some grace, right? And so, each child has different, um, needs and, um, not just dietary. So, some kids will not eat anything but chicken nuggets.
Some kids have, um, did you know that there's therapists for eating? Um, a great friend of mine, her son was very, very, uh, particular, um, when he was young. And so they took him to like a child, uh, eating specialist. And so it would be kind of like going for physical therapy. I think it actually was like an occupational therapist, um, that specialized in eating and getting kids to eat different things.
And so there [00:18:00] is that out there, but just kind of be mindful. Um, their stomach is so much smaller. They need less food. They might need it more often, but they need less food. And so when you're, when you're giving them that kind of food, they're going to need a lot less than you need on your plate. You're going to focus on the nutrition and the variety of foods, and like I said, do not villainize any foods.
So, with even the M& M's, you know, they gave in the little bento box the three little M& M's, but nothing was wrong with those M& M's. It was just eating it in a way that's balanced for our, our, our menu. for our body's needs. So everybody has ideas of what meal time is. And so when I was writing this, I, I don't really know who's listening today.
And so if you know who like the cleavers are to like leave it to beaver, like that was kind of this idea that [00:19:00] I had grown up with was, um, families were supposed to eat at the table together. And so when I had. I really wanted us to all eat at the table together. And what we figured out was I was putting so much emphasis on it that I was not making mealtime enjoyable.
Everybody felt like it was a prison sentence to have to come to the table because of the energy that I brought with it. And so just mealtime positivity, that kind of thing, right? Um, your children's involvement, keeping them, um, Like in setting the table or like maybe they're going to like create a decoration for the table.
It doesn't even have to be for a holiday. Just keep it fun and let them help with like choosing food or prepping it, maybe grocery shopping even. So to break those generational habits, that was really what I was excited to talk to you about. Um, It just creates some awareness and some understanding, uh, [00:20:00] of where our habits came from in the first place.
Right. And do we really want to continue them? So be flexible, uh, so that. You're understanding yourself where your habits came from and maybe why you thought it was important and give you some, some, you know, some curiosity, that openness to, to try new things to see, well, what is important when our son was little, um, our.
Work schedules were a little odd. And so I worked two days a week when he was a little guy and my husband's mom kept him one day and my husband was home. Our schedules worked out this way the other day. And on the day my husband had him and it wasn't like forever, but. There was a time where every week he would feed him for breakfast and lunch.
He would feed him hot dogs and grapes. It was easy. It did not take a lot of effort and [00:21:00] that is what my husband gave him. And I learned to be flexible. He eats very well rounded foods almost every other meal, and it's not that big a deal. And so, some of that same thinking with, it's not that big a deal, you're gonna well round out the rest of his nutrients later, and it'll be fine.
Yes. So, just kind of remember the goal. What was it that you even We're going after. Was it time together? Was it just trying to make sure your kids have energy and that they're growing and they have the nutrients their bodies need? What is the goal? Always go back to that. So promote the balanced approach, avoid extremes, and restrictive rules.
That's, that's really what this boils down to. You're going to follow that body signals, let go of the guilt, and embrace food as nourishment with enjoyment. So we're not Like I said, we're not making it a villain. It's not bad that it's sugar. [00:22:00] It's not bad if it's pizza or something from fast food. It's the big picture.
Learning how to have these things, if you like them, in a balanced way, a nutritious way for your body. So if you need, like I said, there is professional guidance as far as like for picky eaters for kids. And if you need something like that, I'm sure you could contact your doctor. But this kind of reassurance, the, the changing generational habits, it starts with you.
And so if you are a person who's ready to lose weight to change what their family is seeing, maybe you would love to be an example. And you absolutely. feel like you don't even know how to start. This is a great place to start. Like, I can help you with all of that. So, what I want you to do is, I want you to go on my website, coachingkara.
com, Kara's with a K, coachingkara. com forward slash free course. Take my five day free course [00:23:00] and just get started there. Start right there. Keep it super simple. And I am here to support you. Ask me any question you want. I'll see you next week. That wraps up another empowering episode of the concierge weight loss podcast.
I hope you found inspiration and actionable insights that will propel you towards your weight loss goals. If you're ready to dive deeper and accelerate your progress, don't miss out on our free five day quick start weight loss course. Head over to coachinghera. com forward slash free course to gain access to a wealth of valuable resources, guidance, and support.
The time for change is now, and I'm here to guide you every step of the way. Remember your transformation starts with a single step. Take that step today and unlock the life you deserve. Stay tuned for our next episode and remember to keep striving for greatness.
