19:10:47 Hello! Let's see here…
19:10:51 Got everything on…
19:10:52 Looks like we're doing good. All right.
19:10:57 Let's be honest, the holidays are a lot. That's what I want to talk to you about tonight.
19:11:03 There's food everywhere.
19:11:04 Every week, there's another party, and somehow we're supposed to be good.
19:11:08 But here's the truth. You don't need willpower.
19:11:12 To survive the holidays. You need something way more sustainable.
19:11:16 self-trust. Today, we're talking about how to set holiday intentions that
19:11:21 Let you enjoy yourself without going overboard, and why this shift from willpower
19:11:26 to self-trust changes everything.
19:11:29 Alright, let's dive in.
19:11:31 I wanted to share with you, I used to think…
19:11:34 Everyone… I'd go to these… go to holiday events, or I'd go to a party, and I would think, everyone…
19:11:40 would notice I was trying to lose weight. I'd walk into parties already on edge,
19:11:44 Wondering what people would say if I didn't eat dessert, or if I didn't have some alcohol, or if I said no to a drink, or…
19:11:51 If I made a plate different in any kind of way, I didn't try all the things.
19:11:56 Than usual. I think, are they gonna ask me about it? Are they gonna judge me? Are they gonna notice that I'm eating less? Are they gonna have some kind of opinion about it?
19:12:05 I'd spend so much energy worrying about fitting in, or what people would think.
19:12:11 And then, most of the time, no one noticed at all.
19:12:14 At first, that actually made me kind of sad. I'd worked myself up thinking I'd have to explain myself, or justify what I was doing. And when no one…
19:12:23 said anything, I felt a little invisible. You can't have it both ways, right?
19:12:27 But over time, something really freeing happened. I realized everyone else is so focused on their own stuff,
19:12:34 That they're not watching what I'm eating.
19:12:37 And the more comfortable I got with what I was doing, the less anxious I felt about what everyone else may or may not even be noticing.
19:12:45 That's when my whole approach for the holidays started to change, so…
19:12:49 See, I used to think that willpower…
19:12:53 that, ooh, gotta have that willpower, that motivation. It was about resisting temptation.
19:12:58 Just holding out a little longer, saying, no, a little louder, or being the one who could stay strong.
19:13:04 But willpower is like a phone battery.
19:13:07 It drains fast, and once it's gone, you're left running on fumes.
19:13:12 Frustrated and tired.
19:13:13 So, self-trust? Now, that's a renewable source.
19:13:18 resource. It's knowing I can figure this out.
19:13:22 I can make a decision that feels good in the moment.
19:13:25 and afterward. It's asking
19:13:27 better questions, like, how can I enjoy this and still feel good in my body? Not…
19:13:32 How can I not have any of this? I can't have anything.
19:13:36 Or maybe what would make this holiday feel special without feeling stuffed?
19:13:41 Those kind of questions create balance, and they…
19:13:44 build confidence instead of guilt.
19:13:47 So, my coach recently said something, and it really stuck with me. She said, when we tell ourselves,
19:13:53 We'll start over tomorrow, because we do, right, at holiday events and all the things.
19:13:58 It's actually like saying, we're gonna pay the rent,
19:14:02 Later, it's due today, but we're gonna pay it later with a late fee. And that late fee…
19:14:08 She explained as guilt and shame.
19:14:10 We think that we're giving ourselves a free pass tonight.
19:14:14 Uh, but what we're really doing is just adding that
19:14:18 extra emotional weight to tomorrow. So instead of thinking, I'll just do better tomorrow, what if you asked, how can I have this right now AND still feel good tomorrow?
19:14:28 So that's that little different area.
19:14:30 That's where sustainable weight loss happens. So here's what I want you to do this week.
19:14:35 Before you go to any event, whether… we're not quite there to the holidays yet, but maybe it's coming closer for you. Maybe it's just a weekend event.
19:14:42 Ask yourself 3 questions.
19:14:44 What's most important to me tonight?
19:14:47 Maybe it's connecting with family, maybe it's that one holiday dish you really love.
19:14:52 Maybe it's just feeling… calm.
19:14:55 Relaxing instead of rushed.
19:14:57 And then the next question, what do I want to feel like when I leave?
19:15:01 Do I want to feel satisfied, comfortable, proud, peaceful?
19:15:05 And how can I make that happen? That's the third question. How can I make that happen?
19:15:09 That might mean eating slower, or skipping seconds, or just making sure you eat when you're
19:15:15 actually physically hungry, not just because everyone else is.
19:15:18 You can still enjoy all the food, you're just doing it intentionally now.
19:15:23 And if something doesn't go as planned, because it happens, right? We're human, these are new…
19:15:28 Habits for us to practice at holiday events.
19:15:32 That's okay. This isn't about getting it perfect, it's about learning. You can't build self-trust if you never give yourself the chance to try.
19:15:41 If you overeat, reflect instead of react. Ask yourself, what made that hard? Or what can I do differently next time?
19:15:48 That's how progress actually happens. So, picture this.
19:15:53 You're at the next holiday event, the next party, and you walk in…
19:15:57 And you're just relaxed. You're not worried about who's watching, or what they'll think, what you are or are not supposed to be doing or having.
19:16:05 You get a plate, you choose what looks good, that what sounds good, right?
19:16:10 That what you want part. Eat until you're comfortable. Just comfortable.
19:16:14 And move on with your night.
19:16:16 No drama. You laugh, you talk, you enjoy yourself, you go home, and you don't feel stuffed?
19:16:22 And you don't feel guilty.
19:16:24 You feel proud. You feel balanced.
19:16:26 And that's what self-trust…
19:16:28 feels like. That's what becoming a normal eater looks like.
19:16:32 That's what you're building every time you choose to be just a little bit curious.
19:16:37 over being controlling. So that's why it's important this holiday season.
19:16:43 If this is resonating with you, and you're tired of trying to willpower your way through another holiday season,
19:16:49 Or say, I totally give up, I'll try again in January.
19:16:53 I want to help you do it differently this time.
19:16:56 Uh, grab my free go- my free guide. It's the Roadblocks to Weight Loss at
19:17:01 uh, coachingcara.com forward slash roadblocks. It'll help you understand what's really been getting in your way and how to move forward.
19:17:08 And if you want personal help planning your holiday,
19:17:12 Uh, strategy, let's talk.
19:17:14 You can book a personalized solutions call with me at CoachingCARA.com forward slash free call.
19:17:20 We'll make a simple plan that fits your life, your body, your goals, your holiday,
19:17:24 You deserve to enjoy the holidays and feel good in your body. You don't have to choose one.
19:17:30 or the other.
