11:58:24 Hey friend! Welcome to the podcast. We're kicking off a brand new summer series today, and I want to talk about something that weighs on so many women this time of year.
11:58:33 The pressure to be summer-ready. You know, you know what I'm talking about. The shorts, the swimsuits, the social media posts of perfectly posed bodies, tan and all.
11:58:44 The internal checklist that tells you, you can't wear sleeveless tops, or go to the pool until your body is just so, you've lost all your weight It's exhausting, and it's something I want to help you break free from.
11:58:59 Because here's the truth. Summer is a season. It is not a size. You do not need to shrink to enjoy the sunshine.
11:59:06 You don't have to hide to go on vacation or wait to live your life.
11:59:10 The pressure you feel isn't your fault, but I'm going to show you how to let it go and start enjoying your summer.
11:59:17 In the body you have right now. Let's talk about where this pressure even comes from, because we don't wake up one day thinking our legs aren't allowed in shorts, or that our arms need to be toned to wear that tank top.
11:59:32 These are stories we've absorbed from diet culture, media, and years of being told that only certain bodies are allowed to be seen.
11:59:41 Even fun things like cookouts. Concerts, or a beach day can get tangled up in that inner voice that whispers, you don't get to enjoy this until you've lost your weight.
11:59:52 But I want to challenge that. Your body isn't a before. It's not something that needs to be hidden or fixed.
11:59:59 It's your home. It's your home for right now, today. And you're allowed to feel good in it without waiting.
12:00:06 I remember going on a hike with some friends once. I was the slowest in the group, huffing and puffing, falling behind, and at first, I was frustrated.
12:00:14 I kept thinking, why did I even come? I can't keep up.
12:00:18 But instead of quitting, I told myself, I love hiking. I love being outside, and this map matters to me. It won't always be this hard. The entire hike, this is the last time it will ever be this hard And I kept going, slow and sweaty.
12:00:33 Sure. But proud. That day wasn't about how fast I moved.
12:00:38 I was… it was about showing up and doing something I loved in the body that I had I can't tell you that I loved that body that day, but I did everything anyway, and that motivated me to keep going, and I… getting a body that I enjoyed more and more, things that made it…
12:00:55 Easier and easier to do the hikes and be outside, doing all the things I enjoyed, not letting anybody my body, anybody.
12:01:04 Hold me back. Another memory that stands out is when I wore shorts and tank top.
12:01:10 Like, a tank top, my arms out, you know, bat arms and all, after years of avoiding it.
12:01:16 I was so self-conscious. I was worried everyone would notice or judge me, think, how dare she wear that? She shouldn't have that on that body of hers.
12:01:25 And you know what happened? No one said a word. Not one person.
12:01:29 And if anyone had judged me, that would have been about them, not about me.
12:01:33 I know I didn't think that way back then, but I'm telling you now, listen, that's about them!
12:01:38 But what really happened is that I felt cooler. I was comfortable in the heat.
12:01:44 And more myself than I had been in years. That moment gave me freedom.
12:01:49 I thought, how in the world was I in this… A place wherein shorts and a tank top, and it was freeing, and I felt… I felt… bold. That's how I felt. I felt bold.
12:02:03 And able to do anything, almost challenging of anyone who wanted to challenge me.
12:02:09 And not a person did. Nobody. Nobody cared. There's one more story I wanted that really changed my perspective I want to share with you.
12:02:17 I was a teenager at the public pool, laying on my towel.
12:02:22 Trying to stretch out and suck in my belly so nothing would stick out. You know the drill.
12:02:26 Meanwhile, one of my sister's besties. Who had a way curvier body than I did, was sitting cross-legged in her towel, punched over, letting her… Her belly just, you know, stick over the edge, and she had a bikini on. Mine was all covered up.
12:02:40 She was laughing and talking with everyone. Totally relaxed. She wasn't hiding or adjusting her body. She was just there.
12:02:48 She was just in the moment, and seemed to be enjoying herself didn't realize her stomach was hanging out. Didn't even care!
12:02:57 At first, I honestly thought, she should be covering up. But then I thought… I caught myself Being a little mesmerized by her, kind of in awe.
12:03:06 She wasn't the problem. My thinking was. I can still remember thinking how confident she was. I loved it. She didn't wait to live her life until her body changed. She didn't even recognize that her body needed to change.
12:03:19 She didn't sit out or opt out of anything. She was present, right there, in the midst of it all, holding court, having fun. Not realizing that anything was wrong with her body.
12:03:31 That's what confidence really looks like. It's not a certain size. Just being willing to show up and enjoy life as it is.
12:03:38 And that's exactly what I want for you. This summer isn't about getting smaller. It's about getting free.
12:03:45 You don't need to wait for the scale to move to put on shorts to go to the event, or show up for people.
12:03:51 You're allowed to wear what feels good on your body now.
12:03:55 And yes, that includes clothes that you actually want to wear, not just the ones that cover you all up and make It looked like a tent over your body so no one can see you.
12:04:04 You can still work on your goals. We're not giving up weight loss, but you don't have to put off your life Putting it all on pause until you reach those goals.
12:04:13 I know it's easy to fall in the trap of thinking, I'll do that once I lose weight, or I can't enjoy summer looking like this.
12:04:20 But I want to flip-flop that. Ask yourself, how do I want to feel this summer?
12:04:25 And let your choices reflect that. Do you want to have a great summer? Enjoy the sunshine, be out and loving life? Isn't that why we all have that dream of weight loss. We think what what it's gonna be like once we lose weight.
12:04:39 Let's start having some of that life now, and let our body catch up to that, instead of us having to wait for it.
12:04:45 Until… until enjoying life, or can't even enjoy life until we get there. Let's make that different!
12:04:51 Let the body weight catch up with how much we love life.
12:04:56 Ask yourself. Am I ready? Am I ready to, like, just enjoy life?
12:05:01 And let my body… catch up with me. Maybe you want to feel light and free.
12:05:07 So you find clothes in your size that don't squeeze you or overheat you. I remember I used to put on Spanx, or some kind of slimmer, just to hold my legs in place.
12:05:18 Oh, they were sweaty, the rubber on those things would rip through my skin, I'd have heat rash from every contact spot.
12:05:25 A heat rub, for sure. It was terrible. Maybe you want to feel connected and present.
12:05:30 So you say yes to invitations instead of hiding, and being excuses.
12:05:35 Hiding behind those excuses. You want to feel connected. Let's start connecting. People want you there, or they wouldn't have invited you.
12:05:43 Maybe you want to feel confident, so you start practicing confidence the same way you would build a muscle. One small rep at a time, one Nice comment to yourself instead of hateful.
12:05:54 If that inner critic starts up, try what I did. Every time I'd catch myself saying something harsh, like, ugh, look at your arms.
12:06:02 I'd imagine saying that to my best friend. Or a child. I couldn't even imagine those words would ever come out of my mouth to them.
12:06:10 It made me realize how unkind I was being to myself.
12:06:13 So, I made a rule. For every negative thing I said about myself, I had to say two kind things to cancel it out.
12:06:20 At first, it felt silly and forced. It was hard. It was hard to say nice things about myself. Very awkward.
12:06:27 But it worked! I built a new habit of speaking to myself like someone That was loved. Someone that I loved.
12:06:35 So, if you're wondering what your summer goals should be, let's make them ones that actually serve you.
12:06:42 Wear clothes that fit you today. Move in ways that feel good, not punishing, and say yes to the moments that bring you joy.
12:06:51 Practice thinking better thoughts about yourself all along the way. This kind of summer doesn't come from a number on the scale. It comes from a decision.
12:07:00 A decision to stop letting weight be the reason you miss out.
12:07:04 You can still have health goals and weight loss goals. You can still want to feel stronger or more energized, but you don't have to wait for those goals to start living.
12:07:14 Confidence isn't something that magically appears when you lose weight. I've seen women lose the weight and still feel insecure because they never practiced confidence on the way down.
12:07:26 Myself, I look at my skin and I think, oh my gosh, my 230-pound self.
12:07:30 At least had smooth skin. I don't want that fat back in there. I remember thinking how hard it was back then, how hot it was, and how miserable I was.
12:07:40 Now I kind of commend myself. That was an extra 60-plus pounds that I carried around with me all the time.
12:07:46 I can't imagine having an extra 60 pounds on my body and doing anything.
12:07:52 It was like a weightlifting exercise, everything I did. And so, I'm just happy with where I'm at now. I'm happy with my body.
12:08:01 Even with its loose skin. And I'm human. I'm human. I've noticed lately that my neck is looking a little crepey.
12:08:09 And so, yeah, I moisturize, I do what I can, but I don't let it hold me back from anything, and I'm not criticizing myself.
12:08:16 It's just something I notice. I notice that I have loose skin. I notice that I have stretch marks, that I have crepey skin.
12:08:22 And it's like, I'm 46 years old! My body has lived a life. It has protected me, it has shifted up and down the scale with me.
12:08:31 And this is just the body of a person who has lived life.
12:08:35 Parts that I like a little more than others, you know, but none of it is being critical. It's just more noticing it now.
12:08:41 So, when you start showing up for yourself now with the body that you have now.
12:08:46 Something shifts. You stop hiding, and you start living. And weight loss, when it happens, it becomes a bonus, not the requirement for a great life.
12:08:56 If this resonates with you, and you're ready to stop waiting, I want you to know you don't have to figure it all out on your own.
12:09:03 You can go to CoachingCara.com forward slash Free call, and book a free personalized solutions call with me. We can talk about what's keeping you stuck from losing weight, or from going out and enjoying your summer. What you really want with your summer, and how to build something that actually works, without the pressure
12:09:22 Without the all-or-nothing thinking, and without shame. Whether you're just getting started, starting over, maybe you're on medication, I help women create a simple, sustainable plan that lets them feel good in their body and their mind.
12:09:38 The summer doesn't have to be a struggle. It can be your reset, your turning point.
12:09:44 Your permission slip to love life. You don't need to be smaller to enjoy the sunshine. You just need to say yes.
12:09:51 To yourself, to your people, and to the moment you're in. So, go put on the shorts!
12:09:57 Make the plan. Say yes to the invite. Let's… let's let this summer be about freedom, not pressure. You've got this. And girl, I've got you.
12:10:07 I'll see you next week for Episode 2, Body Confidence 101, Feeling Great in Your Own Skin Now.
