Social eating. Eating with your friends and family. It feels hard.
Not because of the food, but because of what it means. It means that…
We are belonging or we're not.
that we're celebrating, that…
We're relaxing and connecting, and when you're trying to lose weight, it can feel like you have only two options.
Be fun, and eat everything.
Or, be good and feel deprived.
is exhausting. It's a lot of tension.
And it's… it's stuff I coach women on all the time. So, think about a party. Everyone's grabbing drinks, everyone's…
Eating some appetizers,
There's lots of laughing, there's movement, because we're maybe dancing, or just…
backslap and giggling. And inside your head, it's a debate.
if I don't eat, I'm gonna stand out. They're all gonna notice.
And if I do eat, I'll regret it, and guess what? They're all gonna notice.
So, everybody thinks people are watching all the time.
And then they think, am I supposed to be…
stricter. Am I supposed to not have this so that I can actually lose weight?
You're not crazy for feeling all of this. You are human! We have all of this going on in our head all the time.
Humans are wired for connection. We want to feel like we belong.
And food? That's kind of the social currency. There's almost always food when there is
a get-together. When you eat what everyone else eats, you feel normal, you feel part of it.
But when you don't, gosh,
you feel exposed. Like, they all noticed.
And that you were not a part of it.
That is biology. It's not weakness. So, dieting made food good or bad.
At events, you're not just eating,
You are good or bad, you are passing or failing, and that pressure it creates all-or-nothing decisions.
I'll just start over on Monday.
It's not lack of willpower or discipline.
That is emotional fatigue. That is exhaustion. Emotional exhaustion.
So, here's the shift.
You can participate without…
abandoning yourself, your weight loss, everything that you want.
You can eat a little slower.
You can check in halfway.
You can put stuff on a plate. You can decide intentionally.
And then you can leave satisfied instead of your normal stuffed.
That doesn't make it…
rigid, or, like, you don't belong. It just gives you some awareness, some grounding, like,
Like, I have a plan. I'm just gonna…
See what they have. I'm just gonna take a breath. I'm just… you hear all the, I'm just?
That's my favorite way to talk myself into something. I'm just gonna get my favorite things on a plate and then sit down and eat.
I'll decide later if I need more, but I think…
If I just do this, I'll be good.
I like how I… how that motivates me.
So, before your next event, decide one thing.
Tonight, I'm practicing…
something a little different. I'm just gonna stay aware.
I don't need it to be perfect, and I'm definitely not going to be restrictive.
I'm just gonna notice it. I'm gonna be aware.
And if you overeat, no trauma!
It's just information. Take that,
data, that information, and let's learn something from it.
Alright, ask yourself some questions. I love, uh, reflection questions.
What do I fear most at social events?
So, what am I afraid is gonna happen?
Do I fear judgment, or missing out?
Or am I afraid that I'm not going to be able to do it, and I'm going to gain all the weight that I've already lost in one night?
Um, when I overeat at those events,
What emotion am I avoiding?
It's because you don't feel like you belong, or you feel like you're being judged, so then you do even more of that.
Um, and then the last question, what would it look like to participate?
without…
to perform, you're not a monkey, you don't have to…
follow the food plan exactly the way you think it's supposed to play out in your head.
What if… what if you were just part of the event, and food happens to be there if you want it?
If social eating feels like a tug-of-war every time,
If you're tired of starting over after weekends,
You don't need more willpower, you don't need more discipline.
You need support while you're practicing navigating real life, and this is where coaching helps.
Because talking through real situations before and after them,
It changes everything. If you're ready for support that feels safe,
And practical. I want you to book a free call with me.
We'll walk through where you're getting stuck,
And what would actually help?
Go to www.coachingkara.com forward/freecall. You don't have to keep managing this alone. I would love to get to help you.
See ya.